Hey guys! This is a topic that might not interest a lot of you because it is quite specific. I learned just recently that I might be a highly sensitive person. ‘Might be’ because this statement is based on internet sources and a few books, not on a specialist’s conclusion. But nevertheless I wanted to write this post, because it might help someone of you. :)
Few weeks ago I was feeling like a total crap emotionally and mentally, when I researched the internet in hopes to find an answer to my burning inside questions – how to feel better and what’s wrong with me. Does anyone else do that? I think you do. ;) And somehow I stumble on this term – highly sensitive person (HSP) or emotionally sensitive person. It interested me, so I looked for more information.
For me being a HSP just made so much sense. Firstly, I have always been repelled by horror movies or any kind of violence on TV (or in classrooms, I remember from 7th grade my Latvian teacher read some kind of story about how Indian people or something tortured their enemies, and I see those images and it makes my stomach turn till this day. I am mentioning this because I want to bring attention to the fact that teachers are not always aware that in the classroom could be people who can be really affected by violence stories). I had this idea, that if I just watched more TV violence (not even the worst kind), I just would get used it and learn not to care, like normal people do. Yep, I can tell you, THAT IS NOT THE CASE. I just made myself more anxious and scared of the outside world. If you are a HSP, DO NOT DO THAT. P.S. I like detective shows, but most of them concentrate around violence and murders. So, I wanted to clear things up, I didn’t go looking for violence stories on TV, I just watched the detective TV shows I liked. Does this make sense? :D I hope it does.
For a HSP watching a horror movie or violence, is like being in that situation. Even those people who like horror movies (something I will never truly understand), never wanna BE in one. HSP can be so empathic that they can imagine those situations on themselves like they have actually experienced them. And it is NOT pleasant.
Some people are like – just get over it! But what they don’t realize, it is NOT something you can ‘get over’. If you know something about ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), it would be like telling and ADHD person to ‘just get over it’ and concentrate the attention and act normal. It does not work that way.
HSP also are highly emotional. It is even hard to explain. Little things can shake them up. And from my experience, logically I understand that there is NOTHING to get upset for, but eyes tear up or voice cracks anyway. And if something unpleasant happens, I can remember that feeling for years. The same shame, anger or anything else. Have to say, I should be able to remember good emotions as well that way, BUT the bad ones are more intense, I guess.
My understanding is that HSP have more sensitive nervous system. People might use the term – weak nervous system – which is kind of true, but not really. I have never thought of myself as someone with a weak nervous system, because I don’t crack easily under pressure and I can keep really calm during stressful situations. I don’t get all hysterical and emotional when people are watching, I think this is one of the misconceptions when you say you are a HSP, people might expect that you are mentally and emotionally unstable. I don’t know about all HSP, but I suspect that HSP emotionality is more in the inside. Person can look that everything is OK, but inside there is going on a carousel of emotions.
And for this post, the last one, HSP need time to reflect. Oh, I understand this PERFECTLY. HSP tend to absorb more from the outside environment – is it emotions, other people’s feelings, just subconscious signs or anything else. This tells me, I cannot be the modern woman who does it all – work, university, relationships, social life and hobbies. This era is dictating people to do more and more, the life pace is so much faster than before. When I was younger (I am NOT old now, btw :D ) I did it all (except hobbies, I didn’t have time for that :D) But now.. I don’t want to be judged for doing less, I want to take time to reflect on my emotions and don’t feel constantly miserable and overwhelmed. For a lot of people, this is not acceptable. Don’t you agree?
Somehow I concentrated on the negatives of being a HSP in this post, sorry for that. :) Guess, that is something, what’s on my mind a lot. But if you are a HSP, this might help you feel more understood. When I found out about HSP, I was relieved. Even though, it didn’t change my situation at all, I realized there is nothing wrong with me. These facts gave me an explanation about things in my life and reasons why I am the way I am. And I felt understood. I felt hope. Because you cannot get better, if you don’t know what is causing your troubles.
Sooo… tell me, are there any HSP out there who stumble on this blogpost? :) I would like to hear from you and connect. Write in the comments! :)
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